Carmen Hawker, Freelance Writer & Storyteller
"Like a lot of women, I have a somewhat complex relationship with money. Having grown up in a comfortable, middle-class home with everything I could dream of; I have spent my 20s struggling to do much more than pay my rent, put food on the table, and not freak out about HECS debt. It’s a reverse Cinderella story!
My story probably feels quite familiar: unpaid (volunteering and internships) and underpaid (community sector) work + a major illness + freelancing/starting your own business = low bank and super balances. So, when I turned 30 late last year, I figured it was time I got my finances ‘sorted’ - budgeting, banking, savings, super - the lot of it.
So, I joined ethical women’s super fund, Verve Super, and enrolled in their Money & Mindset program. I set monthly ‘money dates’ with myself to look over my incomings and outgoings. I followed Instagram accounts to help me ‘unf*ck my finances’. And, through the process of getting ready to launch my own consulting business, I’m scrolling through the MoneySmart website reading up on everything from tax to term deposits.
It’s funny - I saw a meme a little while ago that said something along the lines of ‘sure, I can’t do my taxes or create a household budget, but I do know that the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell’. That is my money story in a nutshell; as I play catch-up on all the ‘useful, adult things’ I wish I’d learned when I was younger.
Neither of my parents came from money and are ‘self-made’, although I understand and acknowledge the immense privilege that comes with that moniker. My Dad grew up on a farm, and my Mum on an Army base - so, I was always very aware that ‘money didn’t grow on trees’, although what a magical thought! That said, my parents were quick to teach my sisters and me that money wasn’t everything, and indeed most of the important things in life are not ‘things’ at all. They taught us that, although money does afford you a certain kind of security, lifestyle and peace of mind - that you only need ‘enough’, and no more.
So, how much is ‘enough’?
What I’ve come to realise is that what constitutes ‘enough’ is all relative. Now I’m in my 30s, I am actively trying to interrogate notions of ‘enoughness’, or how much I ‘should’ have. Instead, I try to focus on how much I do have.
This shift from a scarcity to an abundance mindset has been pivotal. And, while I know that so many people struggle far, far more than I do and that the fear of not paying the rent or experiencing homelessness is a very real one; the shift to abundance, for me, speaks to everything from our faith that things will be ok, to our trust in community, the universe and even the Government that we will be taken care of.
As I start out on my own business journey, I am reminding myself that ‘wealth’, ‘success’, and what constitutes ‘enough’ are relative terms; and that I have the power to define them for myself."